What do you want to be when you grow up?
We ask this question of kids all the time, don’t we? But we rarely ask adults what their childhood ambitions were. But it’s a question worth asking…
On Saturday I went to see the historian Lucy Worsley talking about her biog on Agatha Christie.
It reminded me of my own childhood ambitions – to be a detective like Miss Marple or Nancy Drew. Or a writer. Or (as my lovingly dog-eared copies of Topsy & Tim will attest) a mum of twins.
Funny that I did become a mum of twins in the end (although I’m not sure my parenting skills are quite at the level of T&T’s endlessly patient and understanding mum). And, as you can see, I’ve managed to inveigle a lot of writing into my career as a therapist and trainer. And as for the detective bit – I did work as a crime analyst for a while.
Funnily enough, being a therapist is quite a lot like being a detective – looking at someone’s life with them, at all the nooks and crannies, to help them work out the ‘truth’ of situations.
No magnifying glass but, hey, you can’t have it all!
At The Carvalho Consultancy we provide a fair bit of career coaching, often for lawyers who aren’t sure about whether they’re in the right job. And this question of ‘what did you want to be when you grew up?’ is ALWAYS a good one. It’s where people like me get to bring out our inner Lucy Worsley and delve into the past with our clients.
Because often our childhood ambitions are in touch with our true interests and personality traits. As time goes on, we can get clouded by what we think we ‘should’ be doing or sometimes what others want for us. So it’s helpful to go right back to the start. As it gives us clues which we detective therapists need to follow.
With some clients, we start excavating and we end up uncovering the meaning behind their legal work which they’d lost sight of.
They identify their purpose again, they make some adjustments and they stay where they are but with renewed enthusiasm and insight.
For others, this excavation will uncover another passion that they’d never explored – beekeeping, basket weaving, singing, stand-up comedy, all manner of things. They can then explore that alongside their work and the boost to their happiness can add so much to their legal practice. (PS I love seeing lawyers with interesting ‘sidelines’ like Neil Denny and his baking, Edward Cooke and his music. And then there’s people like David James Lister who even has his own restaurant business!).
For others, the excavation will reveal an alternative career and talking through the options in therapy can help give people the courage to make that jump that they’ve secretly always wanted to. Which reminds me of the inspiring Helen Garlick and her writing career.
For anyone who’s thinking about this sort of stuff, come and talk to us at The Carvalho Consultancy.
In the meantime, you’ll find me curled up in front of Miss Marple!
